12.05.2011

Creation

Not speaking of the biblical kind, I'm talking about the kind people work on our their lives, the kind no one ever does right, the kind that is meant to screw up. It would be and understatement if I merely said I was headed back to the drawing board, remember my path the I had all figured out? Well it was a decent path until I walked into the brick wall.  I haven't wrote on account of my bitter attitude and shitty self pity I inflicted on anyone who dared asked me if I was okay. 


Our bond is broken, it crashed and burned. I can't say that I am sad either, our dysfunctional relationship was a mess, yeah just a hot mess. There is a part of TSwift that will be in my heart always but for once I feel more mature then ever in saying; my happiness began to matter. Yes, I got claustrophobic and much of the stress is because of me but none the less life happened, I grew up, and I meant what I said and said what I meant. I need to be happy, my happiness mattered.


I would say things were mutual between us but the actions that took place just moments after our breakup changed my feelings forever. "Life choses your path, you chose your attitude" if this quote is true her attitude was shitty. She called her ex, talked shit about me, and broke several girl's hearts.Yeah, I am bitter. She texts me a lot now. She misses me. She loves me. She is breaking my heart.


 Worst part is I'm over it. I am ready to build myself back up and find myself and my happiness. I want to give her another chance but I can't trust it, if we are meant to be she will find away until then I will be here; listening to love songs and hoping for a better tomorrow but not complaining about today. The mutual feelings we had were true,we tried our hardest and it didn't workout. Some harm, a couple fouls, two broken hearts one ready to move on, and the other will figure it out I know she will.

2 comments:

  1. You & JAL seriously need to jump on a plane to England so we can all have one hell of a night out!

    ReplyDelete
  2. I'm in pick a time and place, I need a fucking vacation.

    ReplyDelete

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