It's the familiar twitter, call it my pitter, the patter of my heart, the skip the gives me more then an once of hope, the beat that makes me feel alive again. Let's not call it a crush because those are so overrated but, it's something. The feeling is starting and while I can't put my figure on it totally I know for sure it's there. Would it be bad to admit I'm not at all sure what I'm doing, is it worst that these relations are anything but casual. Don't get me wrong I love the attention but with attention comes questions, with questions come memories, memories that can still sour my stomach as much as they can break my heart.
Truth is you got my heart on a silver plater with your kind words, I promised myself it would be causual but here we go I am falling for your quirks, and am infauated with your flaws. This is a dangerous spot to be in and neither of us are ready, oh did I mention there is more then one of you. Yes it's true girl, girl, guy haha in true Meg fashion I got myself into the classic spot where the flirting takes me afloat, destination cloud 9 and I spend more time giggling at the quirks of others that I forget where I am.
So about those insecurities, I want to be as cold hearted as TSwift calls me I honestly do. I wish I could just not feel for a few days, maybe I would get over these flutters. Better yet maybe I could finally feel okay about the flutters, maybe I won't be so scared of the word crush and the theory of love. So many have told me that I need to take time for me, fix all the broke but, let's be honest I learn by doing and I love the messes I make as much as I love the spirals I fall into. I must being doing something right because frankly, I can't stop smiling.
Hopelessly Screwed,
M.
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