Because I May be Bad, But I'm Perfectly Good at It!

I found someone unexpected on Blogger yesterday, I won't call her an ex but we weren't just friends. She was a someone for a couple weeks in my life, though it hurts to admit I used her as a place filler and that was wrong. I thought about contacting her, in fact I had the text open on my phone but, I didn't know what to write. The whole experience was really eye opening, it made me think about how many mistakes I made the past year.

It's is safe to say I am on my path of redemption but I do not regret a thing that happened to me. I am a jerk sometimes, I'm extremely selfish, I over think and criticize a lot of things, but I love with passion, I live for a reason, and I laugh like it's my last chance to breath. Everyone has skeletons, everyone makes mistakes but it's what you do with your skeletons, and the decisions you make after the wrong ones that make you who you are.

So what happened with us you might ask? I met her last year, we got off to a terrible start her big sister was the secretary on my class board (I was the president) she sat in on one of my board meetings, I could feel her looking at me, she watched me like a hawk. I was initially flattered then, her sister creeped me out telling me she stalked me, do I think she stalked me? No but maybe close. She enrolled in my school the next fall I decided to throw my judgement out the window and befriend her, I gave her a shot when S and I broke up. I was hurt, broken, fragile, and ready to feel something and, when I realized she was only attaching to me I cut her off, dropped her like a hot potato, and broke her heart.

It wasn't meant to work romantically, she and I can't be friends though (she wanted to be) I knew it wasn't good for either of us. So in true Meg fashion I took those pieces of her broken heart and set them on fire. Ridding her of me and my dysfunction junction until she matures. Maybe one day she and I will be friends again, after she grows up. Maybe one day the karma for what I did will bite me in the ass, either way I'm prepared.

It's been a weird week so far and oh it's Monday? I heard from S again, I'm getting down right annoyed by her messages now. She needs to move on, it bothers me. Tomorrow is the first day of spring semester and I am extremely excited! I just feel like it's my next step, everything is right with the world. I am happy. I'm going to leave on this note.

Chubbie Chick Lesson #54 - 1 year from now it will be my last semester of my under grad degree, I think I can, I think I can. 114 days until SUMMER!