Lately I have been in this weird mood, the kind that when I hear the right song it changes my whole direction. TSwift and I have been good, I feel like we are finally finding the delicate balance of being together without being together all the time. I have grown my own two legs once again and walk with my own to feet, though I miss my recently loss friends I am relying on my "everything happens for a reason" motto and hoping that I will be better off one day. Like my unemotional mother said "well just one more person that you won't have to say goodbye too.." she might actually be right cut my loses early and just focus on the big decisions.
Drumroll this kid got accepted into grad school, first choice just saying. I have yet to make any big decisions in fact I get sick thinking about it. I'm really scared to leave my small pond, admittedly I am a big fish and I'm starting to feel like it is more of a blessing then I ever thought before. Truth is I really do love my big hearted, and large mouth personality. For those of you who don't know me I am the girl who is louder then most, comes off a bit too much to handle, but makes you feel at home within a large group of strangers. You love me or hate me in our first conversation, some call it a personality however I know it is my biggest defense mechanism, it keeps the fakes away, or well some of them.
I wish there was day that I could look in the mirror and say to myself you are safe and secure, everything is perfect. I can't on any day but what I can say is I am everything that I want to be, I am everything I need to be, and I am doing the best I can.
End of story.